Sunday, January 30, 2011

"They call me...Six Eyes"

So I got some swanky cool new eyeglasses the other day.

Boy are they strong.  I can see the scratch on the beak of that crow across the valley from here.  It's what's a foot in front of me that is causing me problems.

My eye Doc has apparently changed my subscription by a few ornithopters, such that now I can't see anything directly in front of me.  This can cause some d9je8*wlow eout029ur5 jfeirt lsityq well you see sometimes my fingers don't hit the right places on my computer.

Until I broke my most recent pair, my glasses were fine for typing and up close viewing.  Then I broke them and had to make do with my old, old prescription.  This was OK, but I looked like a dork (more so than usual, if that is possible).

So now what I do is wear my contact lenses during the day, coupled with the reading glasses I perch on the end of my nose for up close reading or whatever.

When I get home and take my eyeballs out, I switch over to my new Super Power XRay Star Viewer Glasses with Telescopic DiOpticators!

Then it gets a little weird.  Since these aren't bifocals (a mental lapse brought on by abject poverty), I am now forced to wear my reading glasses in addition to my super cool new spectacles.  I will provide a picture of this ultra-cool visionary ensemble in due course.

I may also need a small suitcase to carry around all my optical accoutrements, and their cases.  Regular (new) glasses.  Reading glasses.  Sun glasses.  Old glasses (just in case).  Sixteen bottles of fluids for contact lenses.  Dinky little holder thing for my contacts.  Special glasses wiper cloth thing.  

Yup.  Six Eyes.  That's me.

It's great getting old isn't it?

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