Soccer Coaching Issue

This year I am the Assistant Coach (note capitals) of my son's soccer team (The Disney Club Penguin Tigers!).

The coach is our family dentist.

This is leading to some confusion amongst both the players and myself as to terminology and positioning. When the coach gets excited he reverts to that which is familiar.

Our game today sounded something like this...

"OK - molars! Back up and cover the guy behind you!"

"Incisors - move up! Cover over here on the distal side!"

"You're an incisor! Stay in the middle of the field! Don't get all occluded back there - spread out!"

"Pass! You've got to pass to the open canine on the mesial anterior side you guys!"

We're learning...