Friday, January 15, 2010

Girls Hockey

I had a memory come back to me the other day, of a rather sordid part of my past which I had long forgotten.

Some friends and I had been playing pickup hockey at the local arena, late at night. Beer was involved.

After playing we all retreated to the dressing room where, again, beer was involved. So much beer was involved that some of us decided to put our skates back on and go back on the ice, in the empty building, naked.

When beer is involved, there is nothing wrong with this decision making I can assure you. Such logic has spawned great success with YouTube videos, the best of which seem to begin with the phrase "It seemed like a good idea at the time."

Now I must pause here to explain something of the male anatomy. If one bends forward slightly at the waist, it is possible to 'hide' ones external bits betwixt ones legs, if you coyly keep your knees together.

If properly inebriated and possessed of a certain ability, it is also possible to skate while adopting such a posture.

Thus was born the girls hockey league to which I claim membership.

I also seem to recall the flash of a camera as we all lined up for a full frontal 'beauty' shot, and another one of our grotesque posteriors, bulging bits prominent.

The troubling thing about this memory is that I do not for the life of me remember who was there, who took the shot, or if my face is visible.

My deep and abiding suspicion is that these photographs will emerge on the internet just as I'm being sworn in as Federal Minister Responsible for Morality and Family Values or something.

Would the owner of these photographs please contact the author, who has a business proposition.

Thank you.

P.S. I had a disturbing time, as you can imagine, searching for a suitable photo to accompany this posting. I was ultimately unsuccessful, although I have accepted several interesting propositions from certain persons on the internet. Nevermind.

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