Lucy

So Lucy is our dog. A ten year old Golden Retriever. She's been a great dog, wonderful with the kids, never a problem. Until lately.

Lately,perhaps because my wife is back at work full time, she has been acting up when we aren't around. She digs into garbage cans in the bathrooms and pulls out all the used (yuck!) kleenex and spits them out on the floor.

She has also been getting into food lately.

By that I mean swiping stuff off of plates, out of cupboards and so on.

By these methods she has consumed in the past month:

A number of brass BBQ brush bristles, the x-ray of which showed them in a nice ball being slowly transported through her system. We think they have passed, but did not find any evidence of them for sure. I don't want to go squishing through her poops to find out either. Can you imagine what it would feel like to poop out a bunch of brass brush bristles?? I mean - can you? Sheesh - I'm shakin all over just thinking about it...

She has also eaten 4 hamburger buns (with butter) which were on a plate on the counter, ready for me to finish cooking the burgers.

Tonight she ate the better part of 2 Ivory soap bars. The big ones from Costco too. Hmmm - this should make for an interesting barf later tonight I figure. Or an equally interesting poo tomorrow. I'll let you know. Maybe I'll take pictures!!

Stay tuned.

Hand Washing annoyance

I am greatly disturbed by people who squirt soap into their hands in public washrooms without first wetting their hands.

As we know, one is supposed to wet their hands first, THEN apply the soap to them and commence the procedure.

I think I can partly understand the 'why' involved. Perhaps there is an altruism at play here, whereby the washer is trying to prevent an unsightly build-up of drip water underneath the dispenser (which will no doubt be the topic for a future rant).

The bottom line in my opinion is this is just plain wrong. Wet hands, apply soap, proceed with washing digits etc.

Do people put the shampoo in their hands prior to wetting their heads I ask?

Using brilliant if/then syllogisms such as this, I thusly win the argument.

No need to convene the Rules Committee on this one.

Good day.