Restaurant Review - Chez Crawford

Christmas Dinner at Chez Crawford was, despite my low expectations, fabulous.

It began with my entrance into the restaurant and being enchanted by the décor. The room was large and featured bits of potato chip visible beneath the comfy chair, a partial couch covered in cat hair and elegantly tousled Snuggies, and a bar stool upon which I settled my considerable bottom.

My server, though scratching and distracted by a good war movie on the TV, was elegantly attired in the finest sweat pants and tent-like tropical shirt. I had a difficult time deciding on something to drink, given my choice of Bailey’s, white wine of unknown age and vintage which had been in the fridge for several months, and milk straight from the jug since the dishwasher was still running. Naturally, I chose the milk since that is always the perfect accompaniment to any meal.

For an entrée (appetizers were not offered), I chose the Hungry Man special – advertised as consisting of ‘One Pound of Food a Manger’ (see accompanying photo)("...a Manger" is French for 'Ici guerre mondial numero deux').

Dinner was served promptly after 9 minutes, plus the time it took to peel back the plastic cover and stir the stuffing and potatoes.

Pausing only long enough to take the enclosed picture, I dove into my meal with relish (ketchup would have been a better choice).

The turkey slices, beautifully prepared by having some sort of white meat substance lightly extruded through an industrial blender tube, were sliced and arrayed steaming before me. They were delicious and tender as only mystery meat byproducts can be. The gravy was rich and filled with vital grease nutrients which I soon felt coursing through my veins. I took the opportunity to use the shooting pains then travelling down my arm to bag six ducks flying overhead.

The mashed potatoes were acceptable, while the corn niblets could have used a little more cooking since, I believe, the server cut quite a large slit in the plastic cover. A more modest opening would have been superior.

For desert, the cranberry apple mush was sweet and tangy and absolutely perfect! The bits of corn and stuffing mixed in only added to its enormous appeal.

All in all I would say that dining at Chez Crawford holds enormous appeal and receives many stars for its warm atmosphere and delightful host.